“RABBI’S MUSINGS (& AMUSINGS)”
Erev Shabbos Kodesh Parshas Netzovim-Vayelech
23 Elul 5784/ September 27, 2024
Pirkei Avos – Perek 5-6
KUGEL JUICE
It’s been said that more people become religious because of the
Rebbetzin’s kugel than because of the Rabbi’s sermon.
This past Friday I couldn’t stop thinking about my wife’s kugel all
morning. While she does make a mean potato kugel (that’s a big compliment for
those who don’t know), that’s not why I thought about it all morning.
During a game played at
last year’s Chanukah mesiba in my home for my students, one student won a
Rebbetzin’s potato kugel. For various reasons we couldn’t pay up our kugel debt
before the end of last year. Last week, my wife sent a hot kugel for the lucky
student. Along with it, she sent another kugel for my current students.
I carried the kugels into the yeshiva building in a box. When I put the
box on my desk, I noticed that my suit pants were very wet; “kugel juice” had
spilled all over my pants. I tried cleaning it off but the stain was
noticeable. Worse than that, the unmistakable spell of kugel was embedded in my
pants.
I once had the idea to
market a cologne that smells like hot cholent and kugel. Imagine! You spray
some of the kugel/cholent cologne on yourself on Shabbos morning, and everyone
wants to be near you. It has the added benefit that if you wake up grumpy on
Sunday morning, you can spray some of the cologne on yourself then and everyone
will stay away from you.
But this was not the way I had planned to market the cologne.
Each Yom Tov of the year has not only unique Avodah, halachos and mitzvos
but also unique customs, smells and foods. Although the special foods are
certainly not our main focus, they do add a personal and meaningful component
to our holiday observance.
Rav Shimshon Pincus (Nefesh Shimshon – Shabbos) relates the following
story from Rav Simcha Wasserman, the founder and Rosh Yeshiva of Yeshiva Ohr
Elchanan in Los Angeles.
There was a family in Los Angeles, who had become religious a few years
prior, whose son was becoming bar mitzvah. The family had many friends, and
they decided to make the bar mitzvah in a hotel. Because the hotel was a bit of
a distance from where they lived, the family requested that anyone who could
not come for the entire Shabbos should join the reception they would be hosting
during the week. In that way, they hoped no one would drive to the hotel on
Shabbos.
Rav Simcha and his Rebbetzin were invited but were unable to attend. On
Friday morning, Rav Simcha called the mother to wish her mazal tov and
apologize that he could not be there in person. He then asked the mother if she
was serving cholent on Shabbos. The mother replied that none of the relatives
knew what cholent was and wouldn’t miss it. In addition, to avoid any halachic
challenges, they decided to only serve cold food, including the meat and side
dishes.
Rav Simcha asked the mother to please serve cholent. The mother was
surprised but she assured the Rav that she would do so. She called the caterer
and arranged that they bring a crock pot full of cholent before Shabbos.
The following day, a car
pulled up to the hotel. A couple got out of the car and walked into the hotel.
As soon as they stepped inside however, the woman turned to her husband and
said, “I cannot stay here! We must leave immediately!” Before the bar mitzvah
boy’s parents could even greet them, they were back in their car.
On Motzei Shabbos, the parents called the couple to find out what had
happened. The woman explained that she was a Holocaust survivor. The Nazis had
taken her from her home when she was six years old. She survived and came to
America where she rebuilt her life. But she could not remember anything from
her previous life. She couldn’t remember her parents and she couldn’t remember
her home or what Shabbos observance was like. Her mental block caused her
untold anguish. She went to numerous psychologists and psychiatrists, but no
one was successful in helping her jog her suppressed memories.
That morning, when she stepped into the hotel and smelled the distinctive
aroma of the cholent, her childhood memories came flooding back. At that
moment, she remembered that she had been taken from her home on Shabbos morning
when the smell of cholent filled the house. The smell had triggered her memory.
She suddenly remembered her father saying kiddush, her mother’s face, what she
was wearing when she was taken, and even the doll her sister had taken from her
just before. The flux of memories was overwhelming and she had to leave.
Rav Pincus concludes that he heard that the couple returned to a life of
Torah and a few years later their daughter married a yeshiva bochur.[1]
Studies of brain scans demonstrate that smells can trigger strong
memories. The brain processes smell using the same areas it would use to
process emotions and memories.
The smells, tastes and customs of each Yom Tov help mentally and
physically prepare us for those mitzvos and halachos. Beyond that they help
embed those practices in the deepest recesses of our minds, in a sense, deeper
than the intellectual components of the day.
With Yom Tov season upon us, we have an added appreciation for the
age-old customary symbolic foods of each Yom Tov.
While kugel juice on pants is never pleasant, the smell of fresh kugel
and cholent can help foster a greater love and connection to the true sweetness
of Shabbos kodesh.
Still, it’s always better to enjoy it with a plate.
Shabbat Shalom
& Good Shabbos,
R’ Dani and
Chani Staum
[1] Rav Pincus adds that, in his opinion, this story does not symbolize the
true “smell of Shabbos”. Rather, the smell of Shabbos is Shalom Bayis –
peace and tranquility in the home. When there is love and respect in a home
there is an air of pleasantness and calm that resonates in the home. That is
the true “smell of Shabbos”.