“RABBI’S
MUSINGS (& AMUSINGS)”
Shabbos Kodesh Parshas Bamidbar
– Erev Shavuos
5 Sivan 5775/ May 22,
2015
49th day of
the Omer - Pirkei Avos – Chapter 6 – Kinyan Torah
On February 17, 2001, my wife and I were married in Bais
Faiga hall in Lakewood , NJ
At our wedding we were joined by our closest friends,
relatives, and neighbors. It was a most special and memorable evening. We were
the stars of the show and everyone who came and danced did so in our honor.
There were flowers, a live band, and other floppy things that made the night
even more memorable. We definitely felt very special.
About a week later I was back in Bais Faiga attending a
‘spousal-obligation-wedding’. Those are the weddings of your spouse’s friends
that you have to attend in order to accompany your spouse, even though you don’t
really know anyone there. That particular wedding was quite a humbling
experience. Here I was standing in the same spot where a week earlier I was the
center of attention and everyone was looking to shake my hand and wish me all
blessings, and now I was just another face in the crowd.
Some people politely greeted me and asked who I was and what
I was doing there. For the evening, I explained that I was “the new husband of
the former Chani Mermelstein”. Some people remembered that our wedding had been
a week earlier and wished me Mazal Tov, others simply asked if she was related
to “the Mermelsteins from Brooklyn ”. [Open
a phone book from any Jewish area and see how many Mermelsteins come up. That’s
one reason why I chose to stick with the name Staum.]
Bais Faiga will always be the place where we married (as well
as the place where my wife went to school, which itself is an interesting
combination), and it’s always nice to point that out when we drive by. But
ultimately, as soon as our wedding was over and we left the hall it no longer
had much meaning to us. It wasn’t so much where it happened that matters
as much as what happened. The important thing is that we were and are married,
and that bond traverses all time and place.
Everyone knows that Mount Sinai
was the location where the Torah was given. We are taught that it was because
of the humility of Sinai that it merited becoming the chosen mountain. We are
also taught about the incredible unprecedented and never repeated revelation of
Sinai, at which all of our souls were present.
Yet Sinai no longer contains any holiness. In fact, we aren’t
completely sure where it is. Contrast that with Har Habayis (Temple Mount
Har Sinai is the place where we forged or connection with
Hashem, and the Torah served as the divine ring. Har Sinai was our wedding
hall. Therefore, it is no longer important to remember where it happened as
much as it’s vital that we remember that it happened. The bond forged there
traverses all times and places. No matter where we have been exiled to and how
long we have been away from home, that bond remains secure.
Har Habayis on the other hand, is the home we constructed for
Hashem. It was there that we learned to serve Him with awe, trepidation, and
love. It was there that He demonstrated His professed love for us through
miraculous occurrences which were commonplace there. A home has far more personal
meaning than a wedding hall. A home represents the perpetuation of the bond and
everlasting dedication to its preservation. Therefore, the divine presence has
never left Har Habayis.
The great Yom Tov of Kabbolas HaTorah is upon us; the day we
recall what and why, even though we no longer know where. Happy 3,327th
Anniversary!
Shabbat Shalom &
Good Shabbos
Chag Sameiach &
Freilichen Yom Tov,
R’ Dani and Chani
Staum