Thursday, January 3, 2013


Erev Shabbos Kodesh Parshas Shemos
22 Teves 5773/January 4, 2013

Dear Principal
I am writing to you out of deep aggravation and frustration. Last night my son came home from school and reported to my wife that the boys in his class didn’t allow him to play in their game during recess. He said that his teacher made him miss the first few minutes of recess because she felt he was being mean to his classmates.
That itself is an outrage! When I asked my son to tell me what really happened he said that all he did was call another boy a loser a few times. So what if it was front of other kids, is that called being mean? Kids have to be able to deal with things. They gotta tough it up and be able to handle it. You really have to help out that kid.
But that’s a separate problem. Because my son was inappropriately denied his rights to recess, he came out late, whereupon his classmates told him he had to find someone else to split up with because they already made teams. I have no doubt that they knew all too well there was no one else to split with him.
I don’t know what you call that behavior, but in my book that’s called bullying. As you know, using any authority or power to get something unwarranted or to push around someone else is bullying. This includes using threats, ultimatums, or exerting strength or power to get what you want, without taking consideration of the victim or his perspective on the situation.
I don’t send my son to school so that his self-esteem could be shattered. How can a group of kids be allowed to gang up on my son and not allow him to play just because one of them was immature enough to complain about a harmless tease and he was forced to come out late?
The school claims that bullying is absolutely not tolerated. Is that just a nice quip you write in the handbook and preach to the parents? Where are you now that my son is being bullied?
I will absolutely not stand for this! I’ll have you know that if you do not act on this matter immediately to rectify this problem, I will publicize the incident. I will write to the local newspapers and tell them about this and my other grievances with the school, and your deficient handling of it. Other parents will join me in bringing this matter to the attention of the school board. So you better get to it and address the situation.
With everything else going on in our crazy society I cannot allow anyone to bully my son. I will not tolerate his being given any ultimatums or threats. So either fix it or face the consequences.
I wait to hear your response and I expect that everything will be taken care of immediately.

Inherent Paradox

Dear Principle: Don’t expect your child’s school to be able to teach your son lessons you don’t live by!

Shabbat Shalom & Good Shabbos,
   R’ Dani and Chani Staum

720 Union Road • New Hempstead, NY 10977 • (845) 362-2425