“RABBI’S MUSINGS (& AMUSINGS)”
Erev Shabbos Kodesh parshas Vayera 5781
19 MarCheshvan 5781/November 6, 2020
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STRENGTH FOR
ALL TIMES
By now,
the beautiful holiday of Succos feels like a somewhat distant memory. The
leaves have changed into their splendor and august colors, and are beginning to
rapidly fall from the trees. Our clocks have been adjusted to Eastern Standard
Time, and the weather has become markedly colder.
But for
me, Succos is very much at the fore of my mind. That’s not because I am so holy
as to be able to hold onto the holiness of the holiday. Rather, it’s because my
succah is still standing on my porch.
We have
a silver tray upon which we placed our esrogim after Succos. From week to week
we watch sadly as they shrivel and shrink. And yet, our succah, sans the
schach, is still up.
I am
aware that there are people who procrastinate and don’t get around to taking
down their succah for a long time. I heard that one woman wanted to serve her
family’s Purim seudah in the succah as a subtle reminder to her husband that he
still didn’t take it down. But I actually have a valid excuse. I contracted
Corona at the end of Succos and since then have physically been unable to take
my succah down. When I was sick, I b’H, I didn’t have any breathing issues,
except for a minor cough. But I felt terribly achy, with severe flu-like
symptoms, including chills and fever.
The
worst part of all was that I didn’t know what to do with myself. Sitting was
painful, and I couldn’t concentrate. I can’t say that I was climbing the walls
because I lacked the energy to do so. But I did fantasize about climbing the
walls.
Then,
when the main symptoms cleared up, terrible nausea set in such that I have
never experienced before in my life. I didn’t lose my sense of smell or taste.
In fact, I had the opposite experience. Many things had an awful smell.
Even
when that finally went away, and even now a few weeks later, I am still drained
and fatigued, a common after-effect of Covid-19.
In
addition, my poor family was quarantined with me, though thankfully and
incredibly no one else contacted it b”H.
So, here
we are a month after Succos and my succah still stands. Although I really would
like to know that the boards are securely put away for next year, there is a
little comfort in seeing the succah up, connecting me to the beautiful Yom Tov
we celebrated a few weeks ago.
The
truth is that moving on and transitioning is always challenging. “The comfort
zone is a wonderful place, but nothing grows there.”
We
tenaciously cling to our comfort zones because the unknown and unfamiliar are
intimidating and scary. But moving on requires energy, commitment, and effort.
Often, we need a proverbial (or literal) kick in the pants to get us moving.
One of
my favorite stories is about a rich fellow who was showing a group of people
around his massive estate. He proudly showed off his huge mansion, his tennis
courts, pools, sports complex, perfectly manicured fields, and stunning
gardens. When he showed them his lake, they noticed a full-length alligator
lying in the sun across the lake. When the wealthy host noticed them staring at
the alligator, he told them that if anyone was daring enough to swim across the
lake, he’d give them a million dollars.
He
waited thirty seconds, and no one budged. He was about to walk away when
everyone heard a splash. Everyone turned around to see Mike desperately swimming
across the lake. The alligator heard the splash, its eyes popped open, and it
dove into the water. The assemblage watched in fear as Mike swam with all his
might as the alligator inches closer and closer. As the alligator lunged
towards Mike with its jaws open, Mike jumped out safely on the other side.
Everyone rushed over to congratulate him. The rich host shook his head, “I
think you’re out of your mind, but a word is a word.” He pulled out his check
book and began writing out the check.
Mike
stood up, still panting, and trying to catch his breath, and said “I just want
to know who the jerk was who pushed me in!”
We
celebrate times of accomplishment and milestones, not only to mark the
achievements of the past but also to give encouragement to deal with the
encounters of the future. In fact, perhaps more important than celebrating the
past is giving that boost of encouragement for the future. The unknown and
unfamiliar is daunting and intimidating. Transitions are nerve-wracking. Better
than getting pushed in, is to be danced in. That chizuk helps us feel that we
are capable of plunging on and struggling upwards to the next rung of our
journey.
We
celebrate graduation when a child prepares to move on from the familiarity of
the school they just completed and are moving on to the next level. We
celebrate marriage when two single individuals pledge to synergize their lives
together and build a home on Torah values. We also celebrate a bar mitzvah when
a child begins his ascent to maturity and responsibility within the esteemed
ranks of Klal Yisroel.
Next Shabbos,
parshas Chayei Sarah, our family will iy”H be celebrating the bar mitzvah of
our dear son, Avi. Avi carries the name of my dear Sabbah, Avrohom Yosef Staum.
My Sabbah was beloved for his sterling character and pleasantness. He performed
great chesed for people, most of which we will probably never know about. He
was honest to a fault and a person that could be counted on. Throughout the
vicissitudes of living as a Jew in America from before the War and onwards, he
remained Shabbos observant and loyal to Torah.
Our Avi
is blessed with a vivacious personality, a quick mind, and is always fun to be
around.
We hope that Avi will follow the path of his illustrious namesake.
We hope that as he forges ahead on the roads of life that he always has the
inner fortitude and confidence to remain loyal to Hashem and Torah. We hope he
will be able to confront the challenges of life with faith and conviction. We
hope he will have the wisdom and energy to erect walls when necessary and to
tear them down when necessary. Finally, we hope Hashem will grant us the
patience and wisdom to guide him properly towards a life of kavod shomayim.
Shabbat Shalom & Good Shabbos,
R’
Dani and Chani Staum