“RABBI’S MUSINGS (&
AMUSINGS)”
Erev Shabbos Kodesh
Parshas Lech Lecha
10 Cheshvan 5779/October 19,
2018
It’s
not just proper protocol and good manners, but it’s actually an ancient custom
mentioned in the gemara. When someone invites you to their home, it’s proper to
give them a gift. The gemara (Megilla 26a) states “Abayei said: we learn from
here that it is proper etiquette for a person to leave his flask of wine and
the hide (of the animal he slaughtered) at the inn where he is staying.”
On one occasion a few years ago, our son
Shalom invited a classmate for Shabbos. Most of the time friends who come for
Shabbos bring a bottle of wine or a candy platter, but this boy didn’t. We
didn’t think much of it, in fact, we wouldn’t have even noticed that he didn’t
bring anything. But then on Sunday night we discovered many candy wrappers on
the floor and an empty platter. It turns out that his mother indeed sent him
with a very nice candy platter, which he enjoyed immensely upstairs throughout
Shabbos.
When
I was the Social Worker in Yeshiva Bais Hachinuch, the yeshiva was once graced
with a visit by Rav Yitzchok Sheiner shlita, the Kaminetzer Rosh Yeshiva from
Yerushalayim. Rav Sheiner addressed the students with characteristic warmth and
love. I typed it up afterwards and disseminated it to the students, so they
would remember it.
The
following are the opening words of that speech:
“I’m very thrilled to be in this holy makom (place
of) Torah. I’ve been living in Yerushalayim for 60 years, and seventy years ago
I went to school in Spring Valley. So we are classmates. I’m just a bit older,
and I’m happy to meet my classmates. This is where I began learning Torah in
Monsey and Spring Valley, so I want to see how my new classmates are getting
along. That’s why I came here.
“I want to give you all a beracha that you should
all become big talmedei chachomim and tzaddikim and you should all be good.
“Do you know what good means? Good means somebody
who makes someone else happy all the time.
“I want to quote for you two lines from one of the
most important seforim every printed – Nefesh HaChaim. It was published by Rav
Chaim Volozhiner. In the introduction to the Nefesh HaChaim, his son whose name
was Yitzchok, and was also very great, writes – ‘I want you to remember these
two very important lines which are one of the most important lines to know:
וכה היה דברו אלי תמיד - this is what he (my father) always taught me –
every day he told it to me again so I shouldn’t forget it, because he
considered it the most important lesson he can teach me –
האדם לא לעצמו נברא – a person was not
born only to take care of himself
אלא להועיל לאחריני - only to help the people around him, to make them
happy and to make them feel good’.”
I have heard this quote on
various occasions, but whenever I do I picture Rav Sheiner with his eyes closed
and finger wagging as he emotionally conveyed it that morning to the young
students of Yeshiva Bais Hachinuch.
We aren’t in this world for our own selfish needs
and wants. Of course we have to take care of ourselves, but that cannot be our
main objective. Rather we are here for the betterment of others, to help make
other people’s lives better in any way we can.
The candy platters we have – our talents and
capabilities – were not given to us merely for own selfish needs and pleasure.
They were given to us to help enhance the lives of those around us. Those
‘candy platters’ weren’t granted to us so we can consume them ourselves
upstairs where no one else benefits from them.
I have a good friend who loves to walk around with open
packages of candy, offering some to everyone he passes quipping, “Can I make
your day a little sweeter?”
Imagine if the world lived by that creed. Imagine
if our society wasn’t so selfish and focused on its own immediate gratification
and development of its superficial image? What a different world it could be!
Good Shabbos & Shabbat Shalom,
R’ Dani and Chani Staum